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Are We Having Fun Yet?

My friend, Race Bannon, Leatherman and writer of “Learning The Ropes,” posted an article on Facebook, commenting that “This is why the classroom-based (instructor at front, students sitting passively listening and watching) is NOT usually the way we should be educating ourselves.”   In BDSM, I could not agree more.

After all, you can read all about it, but until you actually step into the reality of a scene with a willing partner you cannot imagine what it will feel like and what the shared experience will mean to you both.  

Sure, confidence comes with skills and practice but let us not leave intuition behind.

At one of the Women’s Intensives, Maggie and Jessica were partners for an exercise focusing on the quality of touch in energy exchange.  Tops were instructed to take their partners to the edge of their surrender by slowly pinching their nipples harder and harder, eyes locked on each other. Sitting close, facing each other, Maggie, the Top, chose another route.  She knew her partner liked and knew how to process a lot of input.  She caressed Jessica’s large breasts so gently, her pure blue eyes totally attentive, I could see Jessica relaxing under Maggie’s confident touch.  To my surprise, Maggie did not increase the sensation as I instructed.  No pressure, no pain just intense sweetness from her fingers’ tips to Jessica’s nipples. They really connected.   Tears filled Jessica eyes from the conscious power of her Top’s soft touch.  Jessica shared with the group how surprised she was that Maggie got her to bottom not with S/M, but with her gentleness.

Our Intensives focus on building energetic connections between players with trust and negotiation.

We give you tools, show you how to connect…and then encourage you to play!   Spontaneous roleplay is when surprises and ah hah! moments often occur. 


During that segment at a recent Intensive, Camille and I found ourselves coifed with white aprons as makeshift nun’s veils.

Everyone stepped into their roles as “Father Julien” came up to us and said, “Cleo and Camille, you two are nuns. Ok?  OK.”  Camille quickly tied one apron on my head, the other on hers.  She put her hands together in prayer and fluttered her long eye lashes in theatrical humility. I almost laughed out loud!   We were presented with a “young Miss”  in need of “punishment.” “Oh shame!,” Sisters Camille and I exclaimed, “What has she done?” “She had been teaching sex ed at the school,” Father scolded, “as you know, our most forbidden subject!”

I had no idea where His – the almighty pervert Priest of this imaginary Catholic school girl scene would go… I knew the young Miss- one of our volunteer bottoms, enjoyed a good spanking. Sure enough, our “Priest” could not resist smacking the firm and lovely ass under the pleated skirt. Of course he made her expose herself to our “horrified” cries of “oh no, Father!  She is not wearing anything under her skirt!” We continued objectifying our young Lady who seemingly kept protesting but offered her derriere for more blows.

the nuns

Role Play at the Intensives

On the table of available toys up was a large dildo. I had grabbed it “just in case.”  I could always say I found it in the girl’s locker… Our “Father” insisted that she showed us what she was teaching the girls; I was sent to fetch a condom and came back with a banana flavored one.  Our “Father” ordered this “very bad girl” to show us how she unrolls the rubber with her mouth on the dildo or face a serious strapping!  She struggled a bit but did not stop until the task was done.

In our aftercare discussion, Julien revealed how much fun he had and our volunteer was grinning from ear to ear.  If you find reading this arousing, imagine how you can take just about any mundane event, a doctor visit, an office scene, a test, and have a lot of kinky fun doing it.  Remember, we’re playing!

In kink with heart,

Cleo Dubois

You all do know that we are all consenting adults playing with age and gender!  Currently I’m enrolling the Erotic Dominance Intensive for Women Players.  Interested in private coaching? I love Skype!

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